pandalicious's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ferris =( Suckiness. All around. I feel generally sucky right now. So many reasons. First of all, Thursday night when we got home (it was late) we found Ferris at the bottom of the cage, sprawled out, dead. I knew this was coming. Every time I would come through the door my first inclination was to check to see if Ferris was moving, breathing, living still. I've said it here, the struggle with Mike over cleaning up after them, how they'd get sick, how they were ALREADY sick and how they would die. I threatened to give them away, he threatened back by saying he would give away my car, or all of my stuff would be gone when I came home one day. Don't fuck with my SHIT he'd say. I told him then and there that ferrets were living, breathing creatures that needed love and attention and they weren't just items that you accumulate. So basically for over a month the ferret cage was in ill repair, badly needing a hosing down or whatever. You can't let things like that go for long. I'd feed them, make sure they had water and attention when I noticed they needed those things. The litter ran out. I kept telling Mike when we were at the store to buy more. He will, he said. But he didn't. And the ferrets kept shitting, as they are gonna do... and a week goes by and Mike tells me that I SHOULD clean out the cage, not him, but me. I said NO. They're his. I do everything else. He can do that. He didn't. That's when I started leaving him notes on his days off. Clean up after them or they'll get sick and die. I'd say a month and a week or so after I first started hounding him to take care of the cage once and for all, he finally DID. This was two Wednesdays ago. This Tuesday I noticed that Ferris was breathing heavily, like he was struggling. I got him out of the cage and Mike and I cleaned out his nose. It was all caked with snot. I wasn't surprised that he died. Sad. Ferris was without a doubt the COOLEST ferret that ever lived. I KNOW that I petitioned a lot in hopes of keeping them healthy. I question whether I did enough though. I COULD have cleaned out the cage anyway. I wanted to force Mike into doing it. He should have done it a lot sooner. FUCK. Mike was torn up over it. He KNOWS it's his fault. He knows it is. He knows I told him, he knows I warned him that this would happen. Steven thinks that I'm condoning everything he does by not kicking him out NOW. And I see his point. I don't know what to say really. I called Mike's mom. I told her EVERYTHING that's been frustrating me lately about Mike. How he doesn't pay rent, how he gets scary when he's drinking, how he doesn't clean up after himself, how he doesn't tend to his pets. She didn't know that he's not paying me anything. I told her how all of my family and friends ask me what the hell I'm doing. She said "trying to be nice but getting taken advantage of." So she understands the situation at least. Not that she's rushing to help the situation much, she didn't offer to have him come back home. She did say she'd talk to him Sunday about it. So... Friday night we took Ferris to Mike's mom's house to bury him. He had a nice casket. It was a picnic basket, just the right size. We put his favorite toy in with him. I put a Bubbles (Powerpuff Girl) keychain in with him too, just cuz. *Sigh* I'm NOT condoning bad behavior, am I? Fuck. 04:09:35 - August 26/27, 2K :: Midnight ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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