pandalicious's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Rock Me, Amadeus Brr. Brr I say. There are good things happening in the world. There are bad things, too. And struggle. There are people that totally get it and they live in the same town as people who will just never get it. Most people stand a good chance of getting it but really don't stand out as geniuses in the field of getting it. I went out with Leslie last night. It's been awhile since we'd had girl time or really any time at all. She's been workin' workin' workin' a lot. So we went to the usual place that we end up, Jocks and Jills. We go because it's equal distance from both of us, PLUS they have trivia! Yay trivia! As our conversations tend to do, the boy ones came up. I hadn't talked to her *really really* in awhile, so I had to bring her up to speed with some Mike stories and then I told her about Brian who is also a boy one, but much much nicer than Mike could EVER be. He's not *my* boy, but I have been hanging out with him every day now for a week and I totally dig him. =) Leslie talked about her boy, J. and we talked about the play that we saw just last weekend or so ago... Relationships are strange rooms, private rooms. You go into them willingly but you can't take anything with you but the flashes of what your perception is telling you is real. There's nothing tangible about the mystery, the passion... I mean when all is said and done, the most powerful emotions are still ether. You can TRY to express what the ether means there in your loving head, but it's not that love or that passion itself, but a mutation, generally a beautiful one, but still, a mutation of that feeling. Trying to make sense of something you feel in the dark, trying to explain what that touch is like... it's all so difficult. So difficult sometimes that if you think too long about it, it doesn't seem that it CAN BE REAL. I don't know what my relationship is with that ether. I am at times fearful of it, at times I'd like to contain it, to study it, to at least feel its presence. But we go like little soldiers behind our self-appointed closed doors and love like there's no tomorrow, have our battles, rake our hearts over the hot coals of something. And occasionally we report back to each other our findings, our discoveries, our new countries. When you've found new ground, it's a beautiful thing. Tread lightly but with bare feet. 16:51:24 - September 28th, 2K :: 12:54pm ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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